It was late and the house was packed. She was sitting close to the foot of the staircase as people went up and down the stairs. I can hardly remember what we were celebrating but I remember her. This was about 15 years ago. Even then, there was a youthful vibrance about her. Her nails caught my eye, they were long with a fun pink polish. I observed as she called over a lovely little girl and began to feed her as only a Mommy would. I looked on a little confused, trying to match up her fashion fabulousity to motherhood. Thing is, she wasn’t the only fashionista Mommy I had ever encountered. She however, was one of the few who wore their badge of motherhood with such noticeable ease and grace.
Even now, I look at her in appreciation of the ideal she represents for women struggling to find balance in their lives.
As flawless as she may seem, her load is not light. She wears many badges these days, most notably CEO of The Hampton Conference Center and Hampton Party Supply Rentals, Co-founder of the Vincent Kewala Nyambi Foundation and Co-Chair of Hampton Group Intl to name a few.
She has also been recipient of numerous awards including the Couple Community Service Award from African Mirror Newspaper, the Humanitarian Service Award from DeeDee Entertainment Awards, the I AM SHE Arise Woman Award from the I AM SHE Women Power Conference and WODESS Woman of the year 2016 International Award.
A parent can receive all kinds of accolades but the one that will be of most value is the reward that is only reflected in the kind of adult their child grows to become.
The badge of Good Parenting is one Marcelline and her husband Jude have every reason to be proud of especially when their 18-year-old daughter is Venessa Nyambi: a Model, Blogger, Social Entrepreneur, International Speaker AND founder of The Generation Africa Campaign (an initiative to empower young Africans living throughout the diaspora and on the continent). Venessa was awarded the National Academy of Future Scientist and Technologist Award of Excellence, The Congressional Youth Leadership Award, and was selected to participate in the President Eisenhower Student Ambassador Program. Venessa graduated in May of 2017 with honors as a member of The National High School Scholars Society.
So how does this multipurpose woman maintain the balance? How does she keep her children and marriage centered? What wisdom can we take from her journey? We asked and she answered.
Her Parenting Philosophy
Marcelline Nyambi: I think it’s very important we raise our children to understand that they are a unique expression of source energy expressing. Which means they are infinite beings with infinite potential surrounded by boundless opportunity to make a difference. We have to raise them to understand that they are evolutionary beings in an evolutionary universe and are here for a reason and a purpose. And we have to make them understand that their purpose is to evolve into that which God has called them forth to be. They have to understand that their passion will always lead them to their purpose and finding their purpose will build true confidence and help them cultivate their strength and divine gifts.
Marcelline Nyambi: Confidence is not just the result of following your passion but is also the result of finding your strength zone and more importantly understanding God’s will in your life. When children understand who and whose they are, they will always be in vibrational alignment with source energy. In essence we have to raise them to understand that irrespective of their profession or who they are or who they become, their divine purpose is to serve by being the instrument God will use to bring about alignment, attainment and activation in the lives of others.
How She Balances Work and Kids
Marcelline Nyambi: This is a familiar battle most entrepreneurs face and I am no exception. Entrepreneurship is not that glamorous as some people may think. It entails lots of sacrifice from you and your loved ones. Believe me it is not easy but I have come to realize that you have to make a conscious decision to manage to keep up with the increased demands of a growing business and a growing family. Besides, family always has to come first. I wouldn’t be able to do what I do without the support of my exceptional husband.
Marcelline Nyambi: Many entrepreneurs try to separate work and family life, but in our household, business talk is never off the table. You don’t walk in the door and the business disappears. I share the details of our business successes and struggles with my family because at the end of the day they are my greatest cheerleaders. When I bring work home such as following up on emails, I always try to do the work after everyone has gone to bed so that I can be present for my kids.
As entrepreneurs sometimes we try to do everything ourselves. I have come to realized that learning to let go is the only way you can be able to balance increased work and life demands. I believe if you build a good business culture and IF you are a good leader, you will be able to maintain balance. A good business doesn’t need you to micro manage every aspect. You can delegate to people who embody and exemplify your vision and mission and that frees up some time to spend with family. Our family makes a habit of Sunday family days when possible and also we schedule family vacation time.
Balancing Work and Marriage
If you have met Marcelline and her beau Jude, you will notice that theirs is not only a romance but a friendship. They enjoy being around each other. So what is their secret?
Marcelline Nyambi: Finding that balance between work and marriage is essential to honoring the vows that we made to one another. But believe me its not always that easy. We have found that making a list of the most important things to us: God, our marriage and our children helps us to put things in perspective. We try to dedicate one day a week to each other. We schedule date nights, and mini weekend getaway or a weekday getaway since the nature of our business sometimes requires our attention on weekends. We constantly check on one another and stay in communication through out the day because we are each other’s support system.
Staying Fit and Fabulous
Marcelline Nyambi: In order to maintain a healthy and fit lifestyle, it’s important to have some sort of consistency when looking at the big picture result. Make changes one at a time, and don’t make too many changes at once or you will risk relapsing into old habits. However what I do is I meditate daily, I try to maintain a consistent daily workout routine, I try to eat healthy by getting as many fresh fruits, vegetables, and whole grains into my diet as possible and drinking lots of water. I also do routine medical check up and to reduced stress I try to take breaks and relax as much as I can but I must admit I am a working progress on this one.
When we see a woman who has gone through life and attained success, it is only fitting to ask them for a piece of the wisdom they have picked up in their journey.
Wisdom for her kids to remember
1. To remember that an attitude of gratitude is the key to manifesting and to remember that they are a unique expression of infinite spirit expressing and they are here in this universe for a reason and for a purpose, which is to serve in every capacity and platform.
2. To understand they are not here to acquire worldly things, but instead to release the gifts, the talents that lies within them for God’s glory. And that they are infinite beings with infinite potential destined to reign.
3. To understand that challenges are going to come but those dark moments in their life will only be here to help them evolve and grow into that which God has called them to be.
4. To remember that every circumstance they will consider challenges and every blessing is part of their journey. We never lose in life, we learn, we grow, we win but we never lose. Our experiences are our best teacher.
5. To learn to give, to forgive and be love, light and peace in this universe because whatever they do to another will always come back to them. I want them to always remember that everything and everyone is energy. We are all one because we all emanate from the same energy source God.
Wisdom for young mothers
1. I have discovered over the years that mothering is very challenging irrespective of the number of kids you have. Mothering isn’t about the big issues but the small lessons we pick up along the way. They are the legacy we pass on to our children. They are the things our children will remember us for, good or bad. That’s why its important to be a good role model.
2. Each child is unique and different with their own unique talent and gifts. Each child has different needs and likes. They are all different in the way they need to be loved, disciplined, and cared for.
3. You will not always know all the answers. There is no blueprint for mothering. Don’t worry about what other people think of you. Don’t compare your life to everyone else’s. Live your life in a way that makes you happy. You know the old saying: “If mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy” It’s true.
4. When your kids are behaving in a way that makes you least want to give them affection and attention that is precisely when they need it the most. Give Hugs and smile and learn to affirm them consistently.
5. Enjoy each stage of your kid’s life. They grow too fast. My kids are becoming more incredible people every day, and I enjoy watching them learn, grow, and become who they are destined to be. Learn to affirm your children every step of the way. I can’t believe my daughter Venessa is attending college in London. It seems like only yesterday she was born.